A how-to guide on what you should and shouldn’t do on the UAE’s roads

The UAE has some seriously bad drivers. Those of us who’ve since adapted to the way of the road will find even the simplest of morning commutes plagued by idiots.

If you’re guilty of committing one of the below list on a regular basis, then this will serve as a refresher course.

Here’s what to do and what not to do on the UAE’s roads.

CHANGING LANES

dubai driving

WHAT TO DO:

  • Indicate ahead of time to let others know you plan on changing lanes.
  • Maintain your speed, check mirrors and blind spot before merging.

WHAT NOT TO DO:

  • Check to see if you’ve got any Snapchats before changing lanes, maybe even send one with the km/h filter on it if you’re feeling fruity.
  • Don’t use indicators. Indicators are for nerds and beginners.
  • Merge without looking, it’s fun to live dangerously. Do it as a means of testing the other drivers to see if they’re paying attention.
TAILGATING

dubai driving

WHAT TO DO: 

  • Don’t.

WHAT NOT TO DO:

  • Try and kiss the person in front’s car with your own while travelling at 120 kilometres per hour.
  • Flash them repeatedly, because you’re not sure if they’ve realised you’re behind them. You never use your mirrors, why should they? Revel in the ecstasy that is your inflating ego. Immediately ring up and tell all your friends. Bonus points for doing it while driving.
BEEPING THE MOMENT A LIGHT TURNS GREEN

dubai driving

WHAT TO DO:

  • Wait for the cars to move.

WHAT NOT TO DO:

  • Beep your horn within mere milliseconds of the light going green. Let them know your reflexes are superior. Hell, let everyone within a three meter radius know. Marvel as you transcend into your planar form.
ROUNDABOUTS

dubai driving

WHAT TO DO:

  • Indicate which direction you plan to go before entering the roundabout.
  • Indicate when you plan to leave the roundabout.
  • Stay within your lane.

WHAT NOT TO DO:

  • Drive straight onto the roundabout without looking, you’re in a rush. Nobody else is, you’re sure of it.
  • Don’t bother with indicators, let people figure out where you’re going for themselves. It’ll liven up their morning.
  • Change lanes while going around the roundabout. Switch it up. Change is good, or something like that.

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